After hanging up, I became so furious at the possibility that I drove to hospital, regardless. Interestingly, my bother 's wife, Paula, called my cell as I was just entering the hospital to see Lily herself. I told Paula that I would have to call her back as we cells tend to lose coverage in the hospital. So, we agreed I'd call her back later.
The mother was standing in front of the doors of Lily's room speaking with two surgeons. I didn't even acknowledge them and barged into Lily's private room.
It appeared she was sleeping . I squeezed her hand and said everything's going to be okay. She was trying to pull the wool cap over eyes as she cried that "she felt so ugly" and as a result she wanted to be left alone. I kissed her on the cheek and said goodbye. (Just to comment of Lily's physical appearance - it has changed again, the drugs in her system have puffed out her cheeks, neck and arms. In addition, she recently had a rash breakout on her face.
All of which, which she could be related to a 100 different things. It seems the likely culprit are the steroids, which she is being weened off.
The positive news about the visit was that they did not find any lesions (cancer) in her brain. While Lily's mom was overjoyed, I was not. Lily is still peeing voluminous amounts of blood and Lily could be acting "off" due to the kidneys shutting down and her blood toxicity still rising.
That will be discussed later as Lily's mom did see on the in room patient's whiteboard "discuss hospice" written down, which Lily's mom asked them to erase so it's not the first thing Lily sees when she wakes up.
So, here we begin on that path I think as I drove home. Exhausted as I've been up since 1am, I called Paula back 4 times, left a long voicemail to have her call me back.
I collapsed into our bed for about three hours and checked my phone. I got text from my bothers phone. It was being written by his wife. My brother was in a serous motorcycle accident. I called Paula as soon as as I read that.
My brother swerved out of the way of an medium sized animal on his way to work, which put him in the hospital with a punctured lung, several broken ribs and a possible spine and shoulder injury that may require surgery. We'll know more later.
Stupid motorcycle, I've begged him to satisfy his death wish several other ways but to no avail.
My brother and my Lily are still in a holding patter when the rest of us try to hold onto our sanity.
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